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‘Doing it’ all the time?

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How often do you exchange notes with your girlfriend about your sex lives?

And if you do — a topic most women consider too private to talk about — and you hear her say that they ‘do it all the time,’  do you envy them? Do you wonder what is missing at your end?

If she says they do it all the time, does she mean every day? Twice a day? Five times per week? Is she doing it because she is equally interested, or does she do it ‘for him?’ Is she experiencing sexual arousal and climax every time, or just services the partner? Or fakes it? Or a combination of those options? Is she forced into it (and would not admit to it)? The list goes on.

The good news is that if you were to explore it further, you may realize that your friends are not that different from you, and that your sex life is quite okay… That is because there are so many details and factors in sexual intimacy that a simple answer cannot include them all, and that is before we consider sexual misconceptions, lack of information, life cycles, sexual inhibition, the dynamics of the relationship, inability to quiet the busy mind in order to ‘get into’ a sexual mood, etc.

Women typically do not do it all the time.  It is against their sexual template.  Unless they have to prove something to themselves or to the partner.  Or if they are in the early phase of a new and exciting relationship, when newness and exploration rule.  But once the relationship become ‘a routine’ (as in permanent, or long-standing), a woman will wind down on sexual frequency to the typical dismay of a male partner whose interest never wanes…  The solution? create a ‘new’ moment, a different experience, take turns doing something special intimately — can you see the meaning of ‘we had great sex during vacation?’

 

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