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Vaginismus: treatment, cost, cure, religion

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A member of our Facebook vaginismus support group from the UK asked: what is the possibility of vaginismus coming back after treatment? How would you know it is gone forever? What about the cost of the treatment? 

The following reply was posted by a former patient from New Zealand:

Yep, women of all faiths on this site: Muslims, Mormon, Jewish, Hindu, Christian and probably more! Personally I’m a Christian, but didn’t have the whole ‘sex is bad thing’ as I became a Christian later in life.

Why did I develop the condition? I’ve no idea, and I think a lot of women don’t. From my understanding, only a small percentage of women with vaginismus have had a past issue of abuse. Not everyone on here is ‘religious,’ but probably there’s more than usual because in the practice of our faith we’ve chosen not to have sex until we were married, and the wedding night was a big uh-oh and it’s a massive let down. But in saying that there’s also plenty of women in this group who are not religious, young, old, gay, straight etc. And it’s been my experience that no one judges here, we just want to cheer you on ‘cos we know how much is SUCKS to be in your position!

Regarding the funds, I know what you mean. My husband and I went to NYC from New Zealand, so it was pricey, but we’ve never looked back and was totally worth it. For those of us who’ve been to WTC we rave about them because we know it works if you’re able to get there.

Personally, I also suffer from clinical depression, and I think there’s probably a high percentage of women on here that do also (either depression, anxiety or both). I spent thousands on sex therapists, a hymenectomy, further psychologists, gynecological physios, the dilator pack from vaginismus.com etc and got no closer to a cure. Hear me right, some of those things DO work for some women, and if you’re able to cure yourself, then bravo!

I would say though, it you’re getting frustrated with a cure not coming, then consider saving, borrowing, getting help from friends/family etc to get to NYC. I rationalized it this way; You get two vaginismus specialists dedicated to you for around four hours a day for two weeks. At $150/hr (about what a psychologist/ physical therapist charges), that equates to $12k ($150 x 2 people x 4 hours x 10 days). So that’s why it’s as much as it is. I would have spent close to that before I went to WTC. It’s just a lot to do in one hit. In addition to that, you get help any time of the day or night (and I mean any time!) while you’re there. AND they will skype/ email/ talk with you to follow up when you return home if you need to (though you shouldn’t!). They don’t pay us to say this either (!), it’s just so cool knowing they have a cure if you’re able to get there. But as I say, if you do it by yourself (and some women on here have), then that’s wonderful

Apologies for the novel (I think this truly is my record on this group!!), I just thought these things might help you process where you’re at. Know especially that you’re NOT alone, there are women who’ve come from the UK who would happy to speak to you too. Hugs from Down Under! xx

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