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Vaginismus: Penis too big?

While nature created us suitable for copulation, there are times when size matters.

She says: “He feels too big to fit inside my vagina.  When we try, I feel that I am being torn, and the vaginal opening will often bleed.  Try as we may, he cannot get inside me for normal, comfortable intercourse.”

He says: “Yes, I am thicker than average, and some past partner said so too, but we always managed to have vaginal intercourse somehow.”

So, is it her vaginal size? Is it his penis’ size? What is going on?

The penis has two dimensions, length and girth (thickness).

  • The length will fit in as deep as the vaginal canal will allow: most men will fit in completely, while some may have the base of their shaft sticking out.  Some positions may afford greater vaginal depth, and you may want to experiment to find out.
  • Girth (thickness) poses a problem because a thicker-than-average penis will challenge the vaginal opening, often to the point of tearing and suffering when trying to get in.  A ‘very thick’ penis (yes, they do exist!) will make vaginal intercourse impossible altogether.

The vagina is rarely too small in structure.  It may react in nervousness and appear smaller/tighter in some situations, but typically speaking, it is suitable for the average to the slightly-thicker-than-average penis.

The woman should not be blamed for being ‘too small’ or for having vaginismus or dyspareunia before ascertaining that the penis is of functional girth.

In situations when the vagina needs just a little extra stretch, women can try to ‘warm-up’ with a thick dildo before the penis enters in the hope that it will open it up enough for intercourse.

Overall, women should not feel inadequate or feel a failure if he is too thick or seeks surgical expansion (yes, you read it right) to please him at the expense of their own genital and emotional health!

For vaginismus treatment, do not hesitate to contact us!

About The Author

vaginismus specialist Dr. Ditza Katz team member Women's Therapy Center
  • paico November 26, 2017 at 7:59 am / Reply

    Men with thick penises have feelings too….

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