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Guiding the penis?

Do women need to guide the penis toward their vagina when having sexual intercourse or can the penis find its own way in?

Generally speaking, the penis has a built-in GPS and can find its way without guidance, aided by the V-shape of the pelvis that funnels the way toward the vagina.

That said,  reality demonstrates that there are different strokes for different folks:

  • Some women always guide while others never do, or only do with certain partner and/or in certain positions.
  • Some men prefer to guide themselves while others like to be guided (the touching adds to their sexual arousal).
  • Women with vaginal difficulties (vaginismus, dyspareunia, menopause, after radiation) would always prefer to guide the penis so as to  minimize undue pain or irritation.
  • Men with Peyronie’s disease will usually need guidance.

The most important point is not whether the penis needs guidance but rather what is needed for a comfortable, enjoyable, safe and consensual sexual intercourse.

Ladies, you have the final say in the matter being that the penis is a visitor inside your vagina!

About The Author

vaginismus specialist Dr. Ditza Katz team member Women's Therapy Center
  • vasanti August 2, 2018 at 10:15 am / Reply

    The article has dismissed so many taboos from my mind- Tahnks

  • John Smith May 14, 2018 at 12:09 am / Reply

    “Ladies, you have the final say in the matter being that the penis is a visitor inside your vagina!”

    I really take issue with this line. It reinforces the meme that every victim of rape is female. I am a man who has been raped.

    I was recently pushed out of a Toastmasters club for daring to ask some of my fellow members to stop making jokes and threats regarding sexual assault of men. On one occasion a member even said “Try that and I’ll rip your nuts off” – after I had previously pulled her aside about remarks like that. The club’s response was to attack my credibility, and they also subjected me to ridicule, intimidation, gossiping, and manipulation.

    How many women have EVER been subjected to a sick joke where the punchline is a reference to sexually mutilating a woman?

    • Ditza Katz May 14, 2018 at 4:28 pm / Reply

      John, our post’s position reinforces the woman’s choice to accept or reject a penis’ entry. Sadly, there is rarely such a choice in case of sexual abuse.

  • Rajendra April 14, 2018 at 7:52 am / Reply

    Vaginal opening is lower the urination opening so guidance is required if female is bulky otherwise dog shot position is the best enjoyable by both. First penitration is always painful subsequent penitrations are not so painful.

    • Ditza Katz April 15, 2018 at 10:30 pm / Reply

      Guidance can be used if/when needed, or try other positions if they afford you an easier access to the vagina (doggie-style included). The first penetration IS NOT always painful; we caution erroneous comments like this as they cause unnecessary anxiety.

  • Jared Aneyi December 2, 2017 at 10:45 am / Reply

    Men Need To Penetrate Fully.Vagina Is Like A Bladder.It Can Accomodate All Sizes Of Penis

    • Ditza Katz December 10, 2017 at 2:31 pm / Reply

      Not quite all sizes — if the men is much thicker than average, then there may be an issue. We’ve encountered several such cases before.

  • FLORENCE MASIAGA December 2, 2017 at 10:41 am / Reply

    I Need To Guide It For Better Penetration.The Deeper It Goes The Sweeter It Becomes

    • Ditza Katz December 10, 2017 at 2:31 pm / Reply

      That is a matter of personal preference.

  • aliye January 1, 2011 at 1:31 am / Reply

    it is agood advice

  • womentc March 2, 2010 at 2:21 pm / Reply

    The penis needs to be inserted into the vagina although you may get pregnant if he ejaculates by the vaginal entrance, even without going into it.

  • riya shah March 2, 2010 at 9:10 am / Reply

    I want to know the proper point (proper hole) where the sex has to be done, so that i become pregant.

    • Otor jey March 17, 2018 at 2:09 am / Reply

      If you want to be pregnant, just try sex during menstration

      • Ditza Katz March 19, 2018 at 3:11 pm / Reply

        Actually, just the opposite. A woman will not get pregnant during menstruation.

        • petrus May 5, 2018 at 4:35 am / Reply

          You are right, during menstruation period this is what is called “safe period” so pregnancy will rarely occur.

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